Adulting in China

I came to China with the expectation that I might be lonely, frustrated, and even regret my decision at some point. I was unsure whether or not I would be able to acclimate, find a friend group, and move independently in this country. This hit me hardest when I arrived at JFK with all my baggage ready to check-in and walk through security. It hit me for the second time when I landed in Ningbo at 3AM, desperately searching for anyone that looked like they spoke English; it got really real really fast.  I admit, since I’ve arrived, everyday has been a challenge. Something as simple as buying a bottle of water from the grocery store has become a task large enough to discourage me from even making an attempt to quench my thirst, but when I do purchase that water and manage to get a smile out of the cashier with my three mandarin words, the feeling of accomplishment is enormous. I walk out feeling like, well, a real independent adult!

Each day I gain a bit more confidence, not without challenge though. Every day I push myself to explore another block of my neighborhood, say hello to a Chinese neighbor in mandarin, and eat something new. This all seems so minor, I’m sure, but doing that has helped me move through my new home with confidence. I managed to catapult myself into “adulting in China” by opening a Chinese bank account by myself (with choppy mandarin and hand signals), ordering food at local food stalls (yup still alive and I’ve had moments when I wasn’t sure what I was eating), and navigating my way to the downtown area for happy hour!

The nightlife was an experience to remember. I mentally prepared myself to vibe to some house music/ techno (which I can do in moderation), so when I stumbled upon a bar playing Afrobeat, Hip Hop, Arabic Trap Music, and Top 40, I didn’t know what to do with myself. It was amazing to see the unifying effect music can have on people. I met friends from South Africa, Australia, Ethiopia, Scotland, China, USA and so many other places; all here in China building relationships across lines of difference.

After my experience in Beijing where people stared, touched, and snapped pictures, I was worried I would move here and become a spectacle. In reality that has not been an issue since I’ve been here. I’ve actually been approached with the exact opposite sentiment. People have been so welcoming, I’m pretty sure Mr. and Mrs. Ma from the neighborhood noodle shop unofficially adopted me after about two days in the neighborhood. I don’t know what the future holds, but as of now I have no regrets.

“My mission in life is not merely to survive, but to thrive; and to do so with some passion, some compassion, some humor, and some style” – Maya Angelou